chapter 5
When brunch ended, I retreated to the garden to get some air. The formalities drained me. I didn’t notice Michael following until he stood beside me at the edge of the stone fountain.
“It’s rare to see you here,” I said, keeping my tone light.
He shrugged, hands in his pockets. “I like the quiet.”
But his mind was loud.
She seems tired. I should say something nice. Compliment her dress? No, too obvious. Ask if she wants coffee? Wait. Is she mad at me? Did I do something wrong again?
I laughed softly.
“What?” he asked.
“Nothing. Just thinking.”
He looked at me with that same unreadable face. But then, for the first time, he said something real.
“Lily, are you… happy?”
I blinked, surprised. “What?”
“In this marriage. With me.”
He wasn’t just asking to be polite. His thoughts were already racing.
Please say yes. Please. Even a little. Or lie, if you must. I can’t take it if she says no.
“I’m not unhappy,” I said slowly. “But I don’t think we ever tried to be happy. Did we?”
Silence stretched between us.
Then he nodded once, slowly.
“You’re right,” he said. “We didn’t try.”
That night, I couldn’t sleep again.
Michael’s thoughts kept echoing.
In his room, I could hear the faint shuffle of his movements. Then silence.
Then thoughts.
Maybe I should move to her room tonight. No, she’ll think I’m being weird. Or desperate. But I want to be near her. Even if she doesn’t say a word.
I rolled over in bed, staring at the ceiling.
What were we doing?
We had three years of silence. Three years of pretending. Of cold greetings and colder dinners.
But the walls between us were cracking.
I sat up and walked across the hall.
I didn’t knock. I just turned the knob and stepped inside.
Michael froze where he stood, shirt halfway unbuttoned, staring at me like he’d seen a ghost.
“I couldn’t sleep,” I said simply. “And I don’t want to be alone.”
He opened his mouth, but no words came out. Just his thoughts.
She’s here. She came to me. This isn’t a dream, right?
I walked past him and sat on the bed, pulling the comforter over my lap.
“If you’re going to just stand there, at least close the door,” I said.
He obeyed without a word.
That night, we didn’t touch.
But we slept in the same room for the first time in years.
I fell asleep to the sound of his thoughts.
Please let this be real. Please stay.
And I stayed.