I went to his company to find him, but the secretaries who used to treat me with careful respect blocked me at the door.
So I became pathetic.
A stalker.
Lurking from a distance, watching him and Lily come and go together.
Watching him accompany her to appointments.
Watching him carry piece after piece of his belongings into her cramped apartment.
At one point, I even tried to comfort myself with something insane.
Maybe she was terminally ill.
Maybe he was pretending to be with her so she wouldn’t die alone.
I wanted to believe anything but the truth.
Then I saw them in bed.
There it was.
No more excuses.
I ran in, dragged Lily off him by the hair, and slapped her hard, over and over. She screamed. But I felt no satisfaction. Only a grief so huge it hollowed me out from the inside.
The future I had imagined when I was young had never looked like this.
Sebastian sat up in the messy bed and buttoned his shirt slowly.
He didn’t even get angry.
He just looked down at me like I was some hysterical nuisance making a scene in public.
That look hurt worse than the betrayal.
I loosened my grip unconsciously.
He got out of bed, gently pried my fingers out of Lily’s hair like he was afraid Lily would feel pain, then shoved me hard.
I staggered back and slammed into the wall.
He adjusted his cuff and said coldly, “Natalie, don’t push your luck. Everything you have now came from me. If you don’t want it, plenty of people do.”
Then he glanced at me and added, “If you behave, the wedding at the end of the year can still go on. If you keep making trouble, I’ll send you back home and let you fend for yourself.”
My vision blurred.
I couldn’t understand why the person standing in front of me looked so unfamiliar.
And I couldn’t understand what exactly I had done wrong.
To save us, I tried everything.
Relationship experts.
Psychics.
Ridiculous rituals.
Desperate tricks.
All I got in return was more of Sebastian’s growing disgust.
Eventually, he stopped coming home altogether. He bought a luxury apartment across from the company and moved Lily in.
He stopped seeing me.
I went to extremes just to force a meeting. I stood on the rooftop of his building through a freezing night. I hurt myself in desperation. All it left behind was a vicious scar and the final proof that not even that could earn me one more glance from him.
My body deteriorated fast.
Then one day I realized I hadn’t gotten my period in a long time.
At the hospital, I stared at the ultrasound showing I was already three months pregnant.
And I sobbed in the hallway.
I thought God had finally pitied me.
Sebastian loved children.
He had always wanted a family.
Now I had our baby.
Now we could become a family again.
The baby would have a father.
A mother.
A home.
I called him, trying so hard to sound calm.
“Sebastian, come home for dinner. I have good news.”
There was a long silence on the line.
Then, finally, like he was handing out charity, he said, “Fine.”
At eight that night, I put on the red dress he liked best.
I made a table full of all his favorite food.
The lock turned.
Sebastian walked in.
I threw myself into his arms and clung to his waist, crying so hard my voice fell apart.
“Sebastian… I really can’t live without you. Let’s stop fighting, okay? We’re going to have—”
I didn’t finish.
Because a soft voice drifted in from behind him.
“Sebastian, Mary said the baby’s due for her feeding. She’ll cry if she can’t see Daddy.”
My entire body went cold.
Daddy.
Baby.
And then the name.
Mae.
That had been the name Sebastian once said we would give our daughter.
Mae Donovan.
Peaceful and joyful.
He had given our daughter’s name to another woman’s child.